Characters of the dialogue

Bazarov

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite

 

The scene is a large banquet hall along the Potomac in the post-modern state of New Tel Aviv. Governor Philo N.P. Shemite is delivering a speech at the annual conference of the Zionist Aid Society. His rousing oration is gleefully received by the assembled multitude. We enter as his speech is winding down, set to move to the Q&A period.

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. Lastly, I want to briefly address an issue, which while scarcely deserving of attention, is beginning to become endemic in our society - the ludicrous notion propagated by ignorant anti-Semites that Jews control our mass media. These poltroons of uneducated populism seem unaware that in our market economy it is stockholders, i.e. the owners of media companies, that control our media, not a cabal of conspiratorial Jews hiding in dark cellars communicating by secret code. (the audience laughs) With that said, I want to thank Rabbi Yisrael Goldman and the board of the Zionist Aid Society for his kind invitation to speak to you all tonight, and on his leave we will move onto any questions you may have.

 

Rabbi Goldman opens the floor for questions. A large, powerfully built man of about thirty asks to speak. As he approaches the microphone the bright lighting draws attention to his dark complexion, obviously bronzed by repeated exposure to the sun. The man announces that his name is simply Bazarov and begins to speak.

 

Bazarov. Governor, far be it from me to upset such a cordial, accomodating gathering, and heaven knows that what I'm about to say will not be popular. However, as you have seen fit to broach the subject, especially in such a contemptuous, dismissive manner, I feel compelled to respond.

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. Sir, kindly ask your question please.

 

Bazarov. You, sir, submit that it is stockholders who control corporations, specifically media holdings. Are you aware that we live in the managerial age?

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. I'm not sure what you're driving at.

 

Bazarov. Governor, thinkers varying in diversity from Burnham, to Toffler, to Galbraith have affirmed the realities of post-industrial management. The managers, those with their fingers on the actual levers of power, have far more to do with the daily goings on of a major corporation than do stockholders, the overwhelming number of which are average Joes or elderly ladies with no expertise in business administration, and who have little interest in the activities of the corporation beyond its profitability and their consequent dividend checks. That this is axiomatic is easily borne out merely by the well known instance of Ice-T's outrageous 'song' 'Cop Killer' where actor Charlton Heston went before the stockholders meeting of 'Cop Killer's' producer, Time Warner, only to discover, predictably, that these 'controllers' as you call them, were wholly unaware of the song's contents! Clearly, the managers, or in common parlance, the CEO's, presidents, vice presidents, etc., have much more to say about the actual content produced by corporations than do stockholders. To think otherwise is to affirm the absurd notion that Granny Stockholder from Pasadena has more to say about what goes on at Microsoft than does Bill Gates.

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. Ah, but Gates has controlling interest at Microsoft.

 

Bazarov. Arguably, though that brings us to my next point: oftentimes, irrespective of the aforementioned power of managers, said managers have controlling interest in the companies they manage, and if you're at all familiar with the structure of corporations, you know that control is achieved, insofar as stockholders have control as their effective power is inferior to that of managers, with as little as 5-20% of shares, particularly if shareholding, as it often is, is split up in small parcels among countless shareholders. Coupled with their roles as managers, these controlling interests in stockholding certainly gives them the upper hand over the infinitesimal mass of stockholders who have divergent interests, in most cases few shares, and a general indifference to corporate happenings beyond the size of their dividend checks.

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. So what is your point, Bazarov? Get to it. No doubt you are set to finger the nefarious 'Joooooz' [those assembled snicker] as the all powerful 'managers' of the media. [Launching into ad hominem] You undoubtedly would see these poor, long oppressed people expelled, as they were in Spain and other European realms, where despotic monarchs and envious peasants hated and despoiled them for no other reason than that they were financially successful. Shame on you, sir. Shame on you!

 

Bazarov [wondering if Jewish financial support of the Moorish invasion of Europe, Jewish garrisons in support of the Moors militarily, collaboration of Jews with Moorish governments incluiding high positions in their administrations even including the prime ministership of Grenada up till the expulsion of 1492, plus, as the French historian Jules Michelet pointed out, Jewish control of the Spanish Royal Exchequer, might have had a bit to do with European hostility to Jews as well] One question, Governor.

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. Certainly.

 

Bazarov. Who owns CBS?

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. National Amusements.

 

Bazarov. Who heads National Amusements?

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. I -- I don't know.

 

Bazarov. It is Sumner Redstone.

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. So?

 

Bazarov. Well, let me put it this way: his ethnicity isn't Irish.

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. Your anti-Semitic crack is unbecoming, especially before an august body such as this, sir. [the assembled crowd cheers indignantly] And I still maintain, despite your dime store attempt at erudition, that it is stockholders, not your 'managers' that control media corporations. The owners of an entity control the entity. That is an axiom well established in law.

 

Bazarov. So you maintain that it is stockholders, not Sumner Redstone, that controls National Amusements, and through it CBS?

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. Undoubtedly.

 

Bazarov. Redstone owns the majority of National Amusements stock. [at this a hushed silence befalls the crowd]

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite [obviously flustered] That only shows that Jews control CBS, not the media generally.

 

Bazarov. First, your reference to law is faulty. You are confusing control with possession. While possession may be '9/10 of the law', ownership is not necessarily control or even 9/10 of it. We see this in such things as foundations where control is retained while ownership is not. Second, Hollywood scions like Ben Stein and Michael Medved, who are Jewish incidentally, not to mention Marlon Brando, understanding this management principle, have come right out and said that Jews control a major element of the media, Hollywood. Are we to dismiss the testimony of these insiders out of hand with a cosmic appeal to some vague, faceless body of 'stockholders'? For that matter, would anyone dare say that Al Jazeera isn't controlled by Arabs? Granted, Al Jazeera is funded by an Arab state, but if it were not tomorrow could it then be said that Al Jazeera would suddenly not be controlled by Arabs even if it retained its Arab managers? Similarly, is Univision somehow not under hispanic control because non-hispanics led an investment group that bought it out? In both the Arab and hispanic cases the question of substantive control of these entities by these two ethnic groups is not seriously challenged, ownership notwithstanding. Thirdly, even mainstream sociological studies show that Jews make up around 40% of total media personnel, and a heavy preponderance of the actual managers. As if this isn't enough, we see in Morson's Law the fact that a cohesive group can control an entity with as little as 20% of the whole. The upshot of all this is that ownership, while a factor, is a subsidiary factor in corporate life in this managerial era.

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. Morson's Law! Whoever heard of such an obscure idea!

 

Bazarov. Obscure to you perhaps, Governor, though I was unaware that obscurity denoted inaccuracy. If it did string theory or sexual dimorphism, things obscure to most, would be deemed invalid. In fact, what is more abstruse than the intricacies of quantum mechanics?

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. [daunted yet sarcastic] You assume that Jews are like Borg, acting in concert, as if they comprise a hive mind. [the assembled Zionists chuckle]

 

Bazarov. [with tongue-in-cheek] Why, Governor, with the millions of Jews living in Israel, an exclusivist ethnic state, how could I possibly think that?

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. [visibly annoyed] You ludicrously assert that just because they are Jews, Jews act together. They are individuals like anyone else.

 

Bazarov. [looking around him at the thousands of Zionist Jews in attendance] That Jews don't act together as Jews should come as quite the shock to this crowd.

 

Gov. Philo N.P. Shemite. [going apoplectic] You know what, Bazarov? You suck. Kiss my ass!

 

Bazarov. [with a reference to the politician's not so closeted sexuality] I hope that isn't a line, Governor.

 

At this point Rabbi Goldman rushes on stage and declares that other questioners have been delayed long enough. The Governor however erupts into spasmodic coughing and begs leave to close the meeting.